Coping with the first days

So Don Draper left on Monday for the whole Basic Training thing. I'm not going to lie about it, it has been rough, honestly very very rough, especially since Sunday was my Birthday and tomorrow will be his. I also feel like the worst wife ever because we haven't even been married for 3 months and he's already leaving me for 2 months....

On Monday I left him at the recruiter office so he could board the shuttle that would take him to Basic and away from me. I tried as hard as I could to be stoic and be his rock but the moment he boarded the shuttle I dissolved into a puddle of tears. I knew it was going to be hard but I was not really prepared for the emotional hit of everything at once. After I left him there, I went home and my apartment smelled of his cologne and I couldn't bear the thought that that morning had been my last one with him for a long time. I knew I had to leave the apartment just so I could regain some sense of normalcy and I could stop crying. When I made it home that night, I was so tired that all I wanted to do was sleep, but the bed also smelled of him and I just couldn't sleep at all. I found a note he left for me and once again dissolved into tears. I just don't know how to do it.

Tuesday was a very long, exhausting and saddening day. I couldn't sleep at all and was wide awake by 5:00am. I decided to go to the gym and then go to work. I expected that being super busy would've made me forget about the fact that I was all by myself. After a long day of work, one of my coworkers who I'll call Danny (to preserve my Mad Men theme, and because she's as short as the male who plays that character) and I went to the gym to try out a new class and all I can say is "tiny runs" are NOT as cute as they sound. I made it home at almost 10pm and I was so tired that the moment my head touched the pillow I was out cold. At around 11:00pm I got a call from Don to let me know that he had made it to Lackland and that he would probably call me one more time before losing his cell phone to the Air Force gods. The last call came in at 3:45am and we barely had any time to talk before they took his cell phone away. I couldn't believe that the last conversation we had revolved around my inability to find a pencil.

Thursdays are a particularly difficult day for me. Students on campus who belong to the Air Force ROTC are required to wear their uniforms. It feels like a constant reminder of the fact that he's no longer with me. I don't know how I should be feeling except for the fact that I'm alone. I feel lonely. I miss hearing his voice. I know it sounds like I'm insanely needy and clingy but I honestly haven't spent more than 1 day without talking to him in 5 years...

I miss him. I hope it starts to feel better and I can finally pull myself together and be me again.

Thursdays SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

Love, Evy

How we got engaged.

So it is Christmas Day...well really Christmas Night...2007

Don Draper picked me up at my house so we could exchange Christmas Presents and go to the movies. He gave me a gorgeous heart locket with a picture of us inside and then we went to the movies to see "I am legend". Before we got out of his car he asked me how I wanted to see the movie, to which I replied "seating down, eating popcorn, how about you?" I obviously didn't understand the question because he asked again. I was still confused and said "inside?". At this moment, he clarifies. "Do you want to see it as my girlfriend or as my fiancee?" I started crying and he pulled out the ring. Through tears I said: "fiancee". He put the ring on my finger, kissed me and then we went inside to play air hockey and watch I am Legend.

Quirky and awesome proposal, just like us. :)

How those 3 little words escaped my mouth

I’ve been not as efficient as I wanted to be when I started this blog. I set myself the high standard of everyday blogging, but work and real life has gotten in the way… not that anyone’s actually reading or caring but still… Standards, you’ve got to have them.

Our relationship suffered its ups and downs like any other relationship, but it was both very unorthodox and still very normal at the same time. Donald Draper and I went through various “I HATE YOU, I WISH I’D NEVER MET YOU” periods in which we both said how horrible we were for each other, but as they say “there’s a thin line between love and hate” and to be honest, regardless of how much I wanted to convince myself that I hated him I was always fully aware that I loved him more than I could bear.

It was during one of those “I HATE YOU” periods that I told him I loved him, yes I told HIM first.

I had changed my phone number to avoid talking to people or have people talk to me, but time was running out for me. It was almost time for me to move away from home for a second time and I was starting to think that I was making a huge mistake for not talking to him before I left, so I caved in and started messaging him and eventually called him. The moment I called him and heard his voice it was like no time had passed, like there had been no arguments and I realized how painfully much I loved him and how horrible it would be if I didn’t tell him.

I knew I loved him from a long time ago but how I realized I loved him is a story for other time.

So where was I… oh yes… I was about to tell him I loved him.

Twas the night before my departure and I had called him earlier because I knew I couldn’t leave without seeing him. The moment I saw him, all my feelings came rushing back and I couldn’t help myself thinking that I could’ve stayed home with him forever instead of moving to a place in which I had no friends and would be miserable. I couldn’t help thinking that I wanted to be able to see and kiss him every day, and just the thought of leaving him was unbearable.

I called him as soon as I made it home after seeing him; as much as I wanted to stay with him I was painfully aware that I had already made a commitment with several people so I had to put on my big girl pants and keep going with the plan.

My flight was scheduled to leave at 8am the next day and it was still 4am and we were talking on the phone, I knew it was a “now or never” situation and since I already had my big girl pants on I knew I was ready to do it. I didn’t stammer, I just blurted it out and since after I said it there was an awkward silence on his side, I want to believe he was honored and surprised, I quickly told him that he didn’t need to tell me he loved me but I knew I did and I was aware that I had to let him know. So I did.

Love Evy

and after I said it he said it too…

after was like 1 minute after J

The First Kiss

I can still remember the first kiss. As corny as it sounds I can close my eyes and go back to that moment when Don Draper’s lips touched mine. Our first kiss was a combination of opposites; it was one of the most romantic moments in my life happening in the least romantic place I can even think of.

The day of our first kiss started just like any other day. There was nothing special about it, there was no planning involved, it was just an average day. We’d spent hours and hours talking. Day turned into night and I needed someone to walk me to my car (I’m a little scared of random shadows in the dark… I watched too many horror films in which the shadows would take over; but that is another story). Don, being the incredible gentleman that he is walked me to my car and it was there that it all happened.

My car was parked in the most unromantic place ever; next to a dumpster in the middle of a bad neighborhood (so not only the shadows were dangerous, fyi). I went to say thank you to Don but for some reason I just couldn’t stop staring at him, I could see some flecks of green in his brown eyes even through the darkness. Rain had started to drizzle and then and there, with the first rain droplets falling, Don took my glasses off and kissed me.

I can still remember the warmth of his lips when they touched mine. I can still feel the water droplets hitting my skin as soon as he kissed me. I can remember thinking that I wanted to feel that warmth again and again and every day for the rest of my life; and that’s the story of how I became addicted to his kisses.

Love, Evy

How we met

I decided to name this post "How we met" even though Don Draper would prefer it be called, "How I stalked someone and forced him to like me". He says po-tay-to y say po-tah-to. Nevertheless, this is the story about how we ended up together.

In addition to being a chemist, I play violin. I've played since I was ten. This is relevant because violin is what brought us together. As I mentioned in my previous post Don is a symphonic musician, well back in undergrad (in my freshman year) I was a member of the Chamber Ensemble in my University. That semester our professor decided that we were ready to play something more sophisticated and less boring than Pachelbel's Canon (which I still love, regardless everyone hating on it and it being insanely overused). The problem with the new piece was that we needed instruments that weren't played well in my university, after all we were a research institution not a liberal arts college.

My professor, ended up recruiting Don Draper's professor who brought him up along because, obviously, he was/is the awesomest player ever. The moment I saw Don, I knew he was the one for me. For some reason, despite my incredible beauty (or you know, just very high self-esteem), Don never saw me. I was sad, even his professor thought I was pretty (he made some pretty lewd comments which I heard) and for the moment I was resigned to never see Don again.

Flash Forward two years in the future. Back then I was taking Organic Chemistry for Majors (also known as the STUPIDEST USELESS-EST CHEMISTRY CLASS YOU'LL EVER TAKE) and hopelessly barely passing it. It was Finals time, and I had not brushed my hair or bothered with decent clothing for weeks, I was studying at a chain bookstore clutched to dear life to Organic Chemistry for dummies when out of the corner of my eye I saw Don Draper looking at books on Chess. I looked at myself, then looked at him, then looked at myself again and cursed, WHY OH WHY MUST I LOOK LIKE A HOBO!!! THE ONE TIME I SEE HIM AGAIN AND I LOOK LIKE SOMETHING SOMEONE SPAT OUT! However, thinking that the element of surprise would be on my side I approached him. I said hi to him and then nerves came over me and I clumsily sashayed away from him as fast as I could. To this day he still tells me that he thought I was a weird stalker. Granted, I knew his name, what instrument he played and asked him if he'd done something in a random place almost 2 years before, so yes, I can see how that can be misconstrued as stalking.

After that horrific experience and passing Organic Chemistry (YAY!) I concentrated all my energy back into music again. I re-started taking classes at the Performing Arts School I graduated from a couple of years back. I was excited about music again, then one day, as I was waiting in between lessons and chamber music rehearsal I see Donald Draper again in all his hot magnificence walking towards me. I asked to be pinched. It turned out that he was teaching!!! at the school I was taking classes. I re-introduced myself as Evy, weird-girl-from-Borders does not sound pretty, and we started talking about everything, regardless how random it was. I confirmed then and there that I was totally smitten with Don Draper.

Bad stuff happened, stuff that isn't nice to remember or even to talk about. Stuff that involved soo much hurt and pain that resulted in both me changing my phone number and moving across an ocean to be away from him.

They say that time and distance can cure all the hurt in the world, and it did. Six months after I left Don Draper and I started dating, albeit long distance. To this day, we've never broken up (knock on wood) and we're both happy than we've ever been.

So I can say that the moral of the story is: Stalking sometimes works.

Love Evy

PS. I've named him Donald Draper just because Donald Draper to me is one of the hottest fictional men ever (I ignore his flaws and horrible ethics,decisions and lifestyles). My person is the total opposite of the spectrum regarding those qualities, however the hotness, that they DO share.

Let's start from the beginning

My name is Evy and I am a Graduate Student in Chemistry. This past June 18, I married my awesome boyfriend/fiance/best friend of 4.5 years. He's a Musician. Just because he doesn't want to be named I will call him Don Draper. Don Draper plays a symphonic instrument and a month and a day before our wedding he auditioned to be part of the Air Force Band and because he's awesome and full of talent he obviously passed.

It was then that I started thinking about what that implied. We would be newlyweds and he would be leaving me to do the Basic, then the whole Air Force thing while I stay where I am trying to finish my degree. To be honest, the situation sucks. I pushed it out of my mind and focused on the fact that there was no set date for Don to leave. Well, now there is and it is horrible. It is a week before both out birthdays and almost two weeks before we reach the 3-month mark in our marriage. It feels horrible, so to overcome the bad nature of the situation, I thought I would each day until his leave blog about the awesome stuff that brought us together and once he's gone I would blog about what I'm feeling. Damn you Lifetime for not having an Air Force Wives show!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's hoping that whenever he leaves my blogs are more than: "I cried, then stopped, ate a sandwich and cried again."

Love,

Evy